watch out

[unliminal]

WHO: Santa(??) and you!
WHERE: all around!
WHEN: Christmas Day
WHAT: A new challenger approaches...
WARNINGS: Holiday cheer, maybe coal

[ Are the hotel guests in need of a little more holiday cheer, or are they bah-humbuged out? If they are…then that’s too bad! Because a special visitor is making an appearance on Christmas day. What, you didn’t think Santa would be around on his special day?

He can be found making his way around the hotel, across various floors and hallways, fully suited up, with a bag of gifts slung across his back, and he has one for everyone! The results may vary depending on whether or not Santoru deems you as naughty or nice, but it won’t hurt to see what he has to give you, right…?

Just don’t pull on his beard. It’s definitely super real.

Afterwards, in the hotel lobby he can be found with a tray of peculiar cupcakes, offering them to passersby, as well as any gifts he hasn’t given out yet. ]

Hey-ho-ho! Wanna eat my face? It'll make you 200% jollier and sexier. It's true!


[ Results may vary. ]

Comments

[feyfound]

[ When Gojo encounters the bnuy, Juniper is practicing her axe swings in a lobby on her floor of residence - which, on the forest floor, amounts to a clearing with giant mushrooms and logs and such to serve as lounge furniture. ]

Oh! Hail and well met!

[ she has no idea it's gogo-sensei. ]

[unliminal]

[ His jolly disguise has fooled her thoroughly...must be because this isn't his first Santa cosplay! He has practice. ]

Hail and well met, ho-ho! [ That sounds like an appropriately yuletide greeting! ] It's-a me, Santa-sama, here to spread Christmas cheer to all the good girls and boys of the land!

[ ...Thoughtfully stroking his (real) beard. ]

You've heard of me, right?

[feyfound]

Santa-sama...?

[ Now where has she heard "Santa" before... Think, Juniper, think... ]

Aaah! Aren't you the powerful archfey, Father Christmas!?

[ ... ]

Why are you so skinny!?

[unliminal]

[ Archfey......

...You know what, he can roll with whatever that is, sure. Close enough.

Without missing a beat: ]

Paleo diet. It's very cleansing.

[feyfound]

Oh...

[ what the heck is a paleo? better not question it... ]

Well! As long as you're dieting in a healthy way! Anyway, what can I do for you, Sir Archfey Santa-sama?

[unliminal]

[ Good thing she doesn't ask, he'd probably say something about dinosaurs. ]

Oh — right! Uhh, ho ho hooo, have you been a good girl this year, Juni-chan?

[ How does he know her name? It's ✨Christmas Magic✨. ]

[feyfound]

[ He's an archfey, so of course he would just know her name without her telling him! ]

Uhhhh...!!

[ uh oh! ]

I kind of ran away from home this year. Does that make me bad? And also I've killed things. Just bad guys, though!

[healbuff]

[River looks at the cupcakes. Then at Santa. Back at the cupcakes. Then Santa. ]





Does this have a nutrition label on it?

[unliminal]

[ Gleefully grinning back at him: ]

Nope! Made 'em myself, in Santa-san's workshop! You don't need to worry about the nutritional facts, though. They're made with pure love!

[ ...And a shit-ton of sugar. ]

[healbuff]

You're a very suspicious-looking Santa and I question the sexiness it'll contribute but...

[SHRUG.]

I'll take the middle of the forehead-cupcake.

[unliminal]

[ That's it, River, trust the homemade cupcake from a stranger in a Sant costume...

Gojo hands him the requested cupcake: it doesn't have any eyes on it, sadly, but it does have some hair! ]

Here you gooo. I'll give you two gifts if you eat it in one bite.

[ Itadakimasu, my guy. ]

[healbuff]

[River is not deterred. The promise of two gifts makes his eyes widen and he peels the cupcake paper with enthusiasm.]

You're on, bro! And one bite for a cupcake is easy shit.

[He's done sillier things because, in a few seconds, he pops the cupcake into his mouth and inhales it with no hesitation. Don't underestimate a guy who works out and knows how to shovel in food!]

[unliminal]

[ Whoa, damn, he just really went for it. Gojo likes the cut of his jib already. The cupcake is really tasty, too! No weird flavors or adverse side effects tucked away in there. ]

Not bad, not bad at all! For your efforts, as promised...

[ Reaching into his sack, he pulls out two (TWO?!) wrapped gifts for River before holding them out to him. ]

You've been a good boy in the last two minutes. You have been deemed...worthy.

[crimsin]

[ Looks at the cupcakes, looks at "Santa", looks back at the cupcakes, looks back at "Santa". ]

What is with this getup?

[ They don't have Santa in vampire world. ]

[unliminal]

[ That's a tragedy...he could have brought blood bags to all the good little girls and boys.

Gojo — er, Santa — ostensibly sees this as a tragedy as well, his eyes widening with dismay. ]

What, don't you recognize Father Christmas when you see him? Jolly Old Saint Nicholas? The Prince of Peace?

[ Wait, maybe not that last one. ]

[crimsin]

I was not aware this "Christmas" had a father. We have no such thing where I am from.

[ Prince of Peace... I feel like that's a different person that Nico would also not know. Whomst? ]

[unliminal]

Ah, I see, so you believe in the whole "immaculate conception" thing...

[ He holds the tray of cupcakes out to Nico, a bit more insistently. ]

So, you wanna see what all the hubbub is about? With Christmas, I mean.

[crimsin]

Eh?

[ "immaculate conception"??? help ]

I am given to believe it is similar to how we celebrate the Solstice back home. But go on, regale me. I wish to know where these questionably-decorated cupcakes fit in!

[unliminal]

[ He is the last person who should fill in the gaps, but here he is, regardless... ]

There's usually an offering made to appease Santa-sama by his followers, of cookies and milk, but cupcakes work in a pinch. This time, I've decided to be extra generous and give out my own offerings, as well as gifts for everyone in the hotel!

[ He holds up his free arm, like he is anticipating applause for this magnanimous deed. ]

[verkelmpt]

[ Listen, Evan will almost never turn down free food, which is why he accepts the cupcake.

But he is having clearly second thoughts about it, as evidenced by the slight hesitation before taking it in hand and the mild side-eye he's giving the entire array. ]

With all due respect, sir, those cupcakes are really, really scary.

[unliminal]

Scary? The hell's scary about some cupcakes? I think striking is the word you're going for.

[ In fact, he's a little tempted to snatch the cupcake back, since it's going to someone who clearly can't appreciate his vision...but he'll let it slide for now. ]

That's not very Christmas-spirit of you. Maybe you need a visit from some ghosts.

[verkelmpt]

[ He's tempted to say, "Too late on the ghost front," but he's trying to maintain the appearance of being a Normal Teenage Boy for as long as possible. ]

I think it's mostly the eyes... although the icing work on the hat is really nice.

[unliminal]

It's not very nice to tell a guy his eyes are scary, you know.

[ Still, it's far from the first time he's heard it! If anything, it's a testament to his cupcake decorating skills that they came off slightly unnerving to look at. ]

Look, if conquer your fears and eat one, I'll still give you a gift. Deal?

[ ...He has a lot of gifts to give out. He'll look for any reason. ]

[verkelmpt]

Oh, no, sorry, I didn't mean to imply anything about your physical eyes. I think your eyes are very nice.

[ them cupcakes tho ]

I'm not really in a position to say no, though. Thank you very much for the cupcake. You're very generous.

[ And he does, in fact, eat the cupcake, because Evan hates wasting food. ]

[unliminal]

[ Attaboy. To Gojo's credit, even if the decoration might have been a bit unnerving, the cupcakes are very good. He takes his baked goods very seriously! And there will be no strange aftereffects whatsoever.

Instead, all that happens after Evan finishes the cupcake is "Santa" reaching into his big red bag, before pulling out a neatly wrapped gift. ]

Well done, kid! Merrrrrry Christmas!